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Scripts
for our shows are written by the Cramps.
Here's a taster of the scene where Cinderella first meets Prince Vince - a piece which involves a lot of sharp timing from the actors! |
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Scene 4 - The Woodland Clearing. Prince
Vince is in the woods after deciding to disguise himself as an ordinary
man, the plan being to attract ordinary girls. The problem is, could
he convince a girl that he is just an ordinary guy? Cinders enters looking
for sticks. They don't see each other and bump together. P & C Oh,
I'm sorry I didn't see....you. Prince No, please, it's my fault. I was too busy… looking for firewood. I need to gather all I can... for my poor… plain old country boy mother. Who's cold. And needs a fire. Because we're poor and live in a cowshed with… cows… and… sheep… and… |
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Prince No, really we do. Cinders Of course. I live over at Hardup Hall with my family. Prince Hardup Hall - sounds posh. So you're wealthy? Cinders Oh, no, far from it. We don't have enough money to pay the rent and our clothes are tatty and torn. We even have holes in those flat bits on the bottoms of our shoes. You know, our… our… Prince Our soles? |
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Cinders No, really we do. Prince Well if you have holes in your shoes you'd better watch out for snakes on the forest floor. Cinders Snakes? Prince Yes. Adders, pythons… Cinders Cobras? ('cobbras') Prince No, really there are. In fact there's lots of wildlife in these woods. Cinders That's true. I particularly like the birds. Owls… Prince Actually I did see you earlier... Cinders Doves... |
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Prince ...and hoped I'd bump into you again. Cinders Starlings... Prince My friend and I thought you had lovely… Cinders Tits… Prince ..hair. Cinders …and Sparrows, Prince Are you the sort of girl who Cinders Swallows. Prince ...likes to dance? |
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| Cinders
Do you like wildlife?
Prince Wh... er... yes… love it. In fact I've been coming here ever since I was a child. Er… When I was younger I used to use the animals for target practice with my peashooter. I could hit anything, me. Deer - hit. Rabbits - hit. Cows - hit… Cinders Bulls - hit? Prince No, really I did! Cinders begins to leave at front of stage. Prince follows as curtains close behind them. Cinders Oh it's fun being with you! I have such a miserable time at home it's nice to find a new friend. You make me feel so, so human! Prince You know, I think I know exactly how you feel! Cinders You do!? Song - "Mighty
real" |
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Prince |
I was all alone my life - was a drag, I came to the woods on my - trusty nag, and I saw you here with that - dear old bag, and I fancy you would you - like a sh-dance Make me feel mighty real. (x2) You make me feel, mighty real! (x2) Oh I Hate my life
'cos it's - such a bore, I spend |
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Cinders Oh thank you, kind sir. I haven't had such a laugh since my sisters fell down the stairs, but, unfortunately I must be going now or I'll be in trouble. Prince Oh... Cinders I'm sorry… but perhaps we could see each other again? Prince Oh yes please! Hold on, look. Did you know that the Prince is holding a party tonight at his palace. One of those what-do-they-call-thems where everybody dances and there's lots of music… Cinders Balls? Prince No,
really he is! Thing is, I happen to have a spare ticket. Nothing special.
You know. I mean, you probably already have one anyway. |
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Cinders A ticket for the Ball...!? Prince You can have it if you like. Cinders Oh thank you! That's wonderful! So you'll be there? Prince Me? Oh yes... I'll be there. Cinders gives the Prince a hug before leaving. Cinders Goodbye dear friend. See you at the Ball. And thank you again! Prince No problem. Anytime… Prince
turns to leave. |
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